Feeling frustrated?

This happens sometimes when you have done something with all your heart, gave it your all and you didn’t get the desired outcome.

Why do people get frustrated?

In psychology, frustration is a common emotional response to opposition, related to anger, annoyance, and disappointment. Frustration arises from the perceived resistance to the fulfillment of an individual’s will or goal and is likely to increase when a will or goal is denied or blocked.

We grew in a world that heightened our expectations.

Since we were kids, we read stories, and watched movies that ended with:

“And they lived happily ever after”

It didn’t end with: “and they lived together, arguing, having conversations on how to move forward, worked together on their relationship having some good days and some bad days”

I know… not so catchy 

But this is one of the reasons why people go into a relationship expecting to live happily ever after, this is how it was advertised.

Another example: is when we watch an advertisement that says: “lose 30 kilograms in 3 months”.

Then you buy the product, lose three kilograms in the first month and the frustration starts.

It is not going according to your expectations, that’s why.

How to overcome frustration?

This feeling is related to being denied a certain outcome. It is more related to expectations that you have from a certain situation.

So to avoid it, what to do?

1. How to Maintain Control in Frustrating Situations:

Frustration often stems from a sense of losing control over outcomes or situations. Regaining control, even over small aspects, can provide emotional relief and clarity. Here’s how:

Shift Your Focus:

Instead of focusing on what’s beyond your control, identify the aspects you can influence. For example, if you’re frustrated at work, you might not control a colleague’s behavior, but you can control your response. Taking action—like offering help, communicating your concerns, or seeking support—can create a sense of empowerment.

Break Down the Problem:

When overwhelmed by a situation, breaking it down into smaller, more manageable tasks can help. For instance, if a project is going off track, focus on fixing one part of it instead of worrying about the entire outcome.

Mindfulness and Breathing:

Practicing mindfulness or deep breathing can help you center yourself when frustration arises. This momentary pause allows you to respond calmly instead of reacting impulsively.

2. How to Adjust Expectations to Reduce Frustration:

Unmet expectations are a common cause of frustration. By adjusting your expectations, you can reduce the emotional impact of disappointing outcomes.

Be Realistic About Outcomes:

Often, frustration comes from setting overly high or unrealistic expectations. It’s essential to assess what is achievable given the time, resources, and circumstances. Ask yourself: “Are my expectations fair to both myself and others?”

Practice Flexibility:

Being rigid with expectations can set you up for frustration. Learning to adapt your plans and accepting that things won’t always go as expected allows for greater emotional resilience.

Focus on Effort, Not Just Results:

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, the result might not be what we hoped for. Shifting your focus from the end goal to appreciating the effort and progress can reduce feelings of disappointment.

Allow Room for Imperfection:

Accept that mistakes and setbacks are part of any process. Adjusting your expectations to include potential challenges will help you cope better when things don’t go as planned.

By maintaining control where possible and adjusting expectations realistically, you can reduce the intensity of frustration and approach challenges with a clearer mind.

Resources:

Here is how to overcome the frustration:

Extra Resources:

• Book: “The Upside of Stress” by Kelly McGonigal